The Big Bang - New Theory from Wired

Okay, so I was reading this article in Wired (yes, I occasionally will occasinally give a shout out to you...ahem...mom-n-pop news sources....gotta help the little guy) the other day, when I came across this news article. It's all about the Big Bang.

Apparently some dude is applying string theory to the Big Bang and came up with the genius idea that it just loops in a cycle -- one lump bangs into a Universe, then collapses and repeats. I'm reading this wondering...why the Hell is it news? Haven't we all been taught this theory since...like...forever? Well, okay, not you Huckabee. I know you're still struggling with basic evolution, but at least we've now seen a guy who plugs his ears and goes "na-na-na-na-na!" to the entire basis of speciaction and genetic science can still manage to go places. Good for you!

Okay, so string theory. He used string theory. Which is basically Linux for theories. It's the one that does all kinds of things differently and people secretly like but don't really have a reason to use outside of their little world...because no one else is using it.
It's not even that he received condemnation from the Catholic church, because they're willing to condemn gay guys...uh...gay guys...and the devil. Actually, that last one is pretty rightfully earned. If you don't hate the devil you suck.

"According to Turok, who teaches at Cambridge University, the Big Bang represents just one stage in an infinitely repeated cycle of universal expansion and contraction. Turok theorizes that neither time nor the universe has a beginning or end."

Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. Did I read that right? Turok?! And so I read on...

"Turok spoke with Wired.com about the Big Bang, the intellectual benefits of cosmology and his bet with Stephen Hawking."

Yes! Turok! It's freaking Turok and now he's researching String Theory and the orign of the cosmos! He's making bets with Stephen Hawking! How?! Why?! When did this happen?!

He went from:

To:


After looking over his page, I find no mention of Chronosceptors, the Lost Land, bionosaurs, or gratuitous amounts of first person violence -- just legitimate mathematics. What's the deal? Seriously? Go back to your old job, Turok; we need more dinosaur hunters in this world.